


Sunflowers and Daffodils

by lesbianjunnie (chenxingluvr)



Category: NCT (Band), NCT Dream, We Go Up - NCT Dream (Music Video)
Genre: Angst and Feels, Character Death, Established Lee Donghyuck | Haechan/Mark Lee, Hanahaki Disease, Huang Ren Jun-centric, M/M, Minor Lee Donghyuck | Haechan/Mark Lee, One-Sided Huang Renjun/Mark Lee, Sad Huang Ren Jun, markren, markren best friends, unrequited markren
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-13
Updated: 2020-03-13
Packaged: 2021-03-01 04:07:10
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 865
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23129008
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chenxingluvr/pseuds/lesbianjunnie
Summary: He was your sunflower and I was your daffodil
Relationships: Huang Ren Jun & Mark Lee, Huang Ren Jun/Mark Lee, markren - Relationship
Comments: 6
Kudos: 32





	Sunflowers and Daffodils

It's alright for Mark to ignore Renjun

It's alright for Mark to only call Renjun when he needs him

It's alright if Mark doesn't really see anything in Renjun

It's alright that Mark doesn't really care much about Renjun 

It's alright that Mark doesn't bother to spare Renjun his time

But it's not alright when Renjun starts coughing up flowers and blood.

𝘛𝘪𝘮𝘦 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘴, 𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦 𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘨𝘪𝘷𝘦𝘴, 𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦 𝘰𝘯𝘭𝘺 𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘷𝘦𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘳𝘦𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘪𝘴𝘤𝘦𝘯𝘤𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘮𝘦𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘴.

Mark is only human and Mark too has feelings, feelings that are not for Renjun, feelings that only he gives to Lee Donghyuck. 

Renjun understands that Mark is in love with someone else, he really does, but it hurts, it puts Renjun in anguish, it makes Renjun's lungs squeeze with pain, roots crawling and wrapping themselves around his lungs, thorns scratching his throat, leaves tickling his insides, petals forcing themselves out from him, retching blood and petals from all different kinds of flowers.

daffodils, white roses, yellow and pink carnations, pink camellias, purple hyacinths, anemones, acacia blossoms, and forget-me-nots.

They look beautiful and morbid covered in blood as the petals continue choking Renjun.

There was nothing more scary when Renjun found himself kneeling on the grimy ceramic tiles of their old school cubicles, hurling towards the bowl in front of him, forcing out blood and petals. 

"𝘕𝘰... 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘤𝘢𝘯'𝘵 𝘣𝘦"

Renjun knew that this day would come— when he slowly stopped breathing, lungs too full of petals, heart too heavy, he could have stopped this, he could have done something, anything.. there was a way, a chance, but no matter the severity of his condition he was willing to risk it all for Mark, because he was in love, because he was all he's ever wanted. 

He couldn't lose these feelings, not now, not ever. Not even if Mark didn't love him back.

Renjun knew what his condition was, he wasn't stupid, he knew all about it, it was everywhere, it was common, yet it so lethal. Free falling wasn't a choice in Renjun's world, one wrong move and you could die, slow and agonizing, just because you fell in love with someone who didn't love you back, but it was a risk Renjun was willing to take, anything for Mark.

There was a way for Renjun to live: surgery. It was easy as that, but he refused, he was stubborn. Few have died many have lived, but Renjun didn't care, he didn't want to get rid of these feelings, even with the suffocating flowers that reminded him everyday that Mark would never love him, he just couldn't give them up, not when he's lived almost all his life loving Mark

Renjun knew he would die, with the way he was choking on petals and almost expelling flowers whole and blood covering those beautiful plants, he could tell how his condition was incurable at this point, there was not much time. 

With each day that passed it just got worse and worse, Renjun couldn't handle watching Mark chase Donghyuck with their uncertain relationship, he couldn't take it anymore and it felt heavier and heavier, the weight in his chest unbearable, the flowers choking him were too much, the thorns that pricked his throat excruciating and the last thing he remembered was the image of Mark kissing Donghyuck.

"𝙍𝙚𝙣𝙟𝙪𝙣!!"

𝘛𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘪𝘴 𝘪𝘵, 𝘐 𝘨𝘶𝘦𝘴𝘴.

𝘏𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘴𝘶𝘯𝘧𝘭𝘰𝘸𝘦𝘳 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘐 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘥𝘢𝘧𝘧𝘰𝘥𝘪𝘭

"𝙋𝙡𝙚𝙖𝙨𝙚! 𝘿𝙤 𝙨𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜! 𝘼𝙣𝙮𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜..."

"𝙈𝙖𝙧𝙠, 𝙡𝙚𝙩 𝙝𝙞𝙢 𝙜𝙤..."

"𝙉𝙤! 𝙉𝙤 𝙣𝙤 𝙣𝙤- 𝙝𝙚'𝙨 𝙙𝙮𝙞𝙣𝙜! 𝙒𝙚 𝙘𝙖𝙣 𝙨𝙩𝙞𝙡𝙡 𝙨𝙖𝙫𝙚 𝙝𝙞𝙢!"

"𝙈𝙧. 𝙇𝙚𝙚, 𝙬𝙚 𝙘𝙖𝙣𝙣𝙤𝙩 𝙙𝙤 𝙖𝙣𝙮𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜, 𝙬𝙚'𝙫𝙚 𝙗𝙚𝙚𝙣 𝙜𝙞𝙫𝙚𝙣 𝙥𝙧𝙞𝙤𝙧 𝙣𝙤𝙩𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙧𝙮𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙝𝙖𝙨 𝙗𝙚𝙚𝙣 𝙨𝙚𝙩𝙩𝙡𝙚𝙙 𝙗𝙮 𝙈𝙧. 𝙃𝙪𝙖𝙣𝙜 𝙝𝙞𝙢𝙨𝙚𝙡𝙛, 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧𝙚 𝙞𝙨 𝙣𝙤𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙬𝙚 𝙘𝙖𝙣 𝙙𝙤"

"𝙏𝙝𝙖𝙩'𝙨 𝙢𝙮 𝙛𝙪𝙘𝙠𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙗𝙚𝙨𝙩 𝙛𝙧𝙞𝙚𝙣𝙙! 𝘼𝙧𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙞𝙣𝙨𝙖𝙣𝙚!? 𝙃𝙚'𝙨 𝙜𝙤𝙣𝙣𝙖 𝙙𝙞𝙚, 𝙥𝙡𝙚𝙖𝙨𝙚.. 𝙄 𝙗𝙚𝙜 𝙮𝙤𝙪, 𝙙𝙤 𝙨𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜!"

Renjun heard shouts from his slipping consciousness, it felt like his head was under water, he felt like he could see but everything was blurry, he could hear but it sounded muffled, everything made sense and didn't at the same time, like everything in his world as of what state he was in contradicted itself, it was all floaty and light.. then it crashed down on him, Mark's voice urgent and pleading, Donghyuck trying to comfort him and pull him away, the doctor seemingly relaxed but was moving frantically, nurses flooding the room.

And then there was nothing but static.

𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘐 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘳𝘰𝘴𝘦𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘥𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘩

The day Renjun left the world Mark was flooded by so much flowers and notes that gave their meaning, he was suffocated with the feeling that the flowers brought him, the pain Renjun felt, all the things that remain unsaid wash over him like a tidal wave, ripping him in directions with every flower he saw.

The flowers Renjun covered in blood and the flowers Renjun felt were all over Mark's floors as he coated it with his own set of tears salty and filled with despair 

𝘖𝘩 𝘔𝘢𝘳𝘬, 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘮𝘺 𝘭𝘪𝘭𝘺 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘷𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘦𝘺 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘭𝘪𝘭𝘢𝘤

𝘈𝘯𝘥 𝘋𝘰𝘯𝘨𝘩𝘺𝘶𝘤𝘬 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘴𝘶𝘯𝘧𝘭𝘰𝘸𝘦𝘳

𝘙𝘦𝘥 𝘤𝘩𝘳𝘺𝘴𝘢𝘯𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘮𝘶𝘮𝘴 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘰𝘯𝘭𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘐 𝘨𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶

𝘚𝘰 𝘨𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘮𝘦 𝘣𝘶𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘧𝘭𝘺 𝘸𝘦𝘦𝘥𝘴 𝘪𝘯 𝘦𝘹𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘱𝘪𝘯𝘬 𝘤𝘢𝘳𝘯𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴

𝘈𝘯𝘥 𝘐'𝘭𝘭 𝘣𝘦 𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘨𝘰𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘯 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘳𝘦𝘮𝘢𝘪𝘯 𝘢 𝘥𝘢𝘧𝘧𝘰𝘥𝘪𝘭.


End file.
